Bah, Dis Donc, Mama!

Johnny Leger, my first "steady" boyfriend. 

Dad was stationed in Paris, France with SHAPE (Supreme Headquarters Allied Powers Europe) for all four years of my high school, and instead of living on the Army post, my parents rented part of a house in Croissy-sur-Seine outside of Paris. 

Our widowed landlady had made a one-room apartment for herself on the ground floor, and Mom, Dad, and I had the rest of the small two-story home (my brother Chuck, four years older, was attending the University of Maryland extension program in Munich the first two years, and then back in the States). 

The grounds were typically French, with a garden, apple tree, and gate in front, a gravel path leading back to the house. Living in this small town was great for immersing ourselves in the French culture, but we didn't have a phone, and it was difficult for me to connect with other Army kids, so I quickly learned enough French to take a bus everywhere, including the activity center at the Army post, where other teens gathered on weekends. 

One day my girlfriends and I saw this handsome boy riding around on a motorcycle there, circling by over and over, just looking at us but not stopping. So I walked out to where we could talk, and that was the beginning of a two-year romance. His actual name was Jean (pronounced a bit like the English word want, with a soft "J" in Jean) and his parents were French, but he'd been born in the States while his father worked there, so had dual citizenship and preferred to be called "Johnny.".

 

Johnny was a quiet, sweet-natured boy. We never talked about marriage or the future, though we were still a couple at my Junior prom. His motorcycle was our usual transportation, but we took the train that night to protect my formal gown, the train station about a mile from our house. I don't remember who drove us to the station before the dance, but I do remember walking together to my house from the station afterward and our long goodbye at the gate. He would be leaving the next morning to join the U.S. Army.

To my surprise, I never heard from Johnny again, and my senior year brought tall, handsome Bruce to our school, so I moved on. But after coming to Florida in my early sixties, when the internet was beginning to flourish, I paid a search function to look up "Jean Leger," thinking there couldn't be too many men of that name, near my age, born in the U.S. of French parents, and who'd been in the U.S. Army. I was right--there were only three possibilities and I wrote to all three, explaining who I was and asking if any of them was the Johnny I'd known, and if so, to please write, tell me about his life.

Two weeks later I received a letter and photo. Now "Jean" (rhymes with "queen"), as his American buddies always called him, he'd had an Army career, a long and happy marriage with four children and many grandchildren. I was appalled, however, to learn from his letter that he had, indeed, come back after basic training and spoken to my mother, who said she'd tell me he'd come by. But Mom had not told me. When I asked her about this she apologized, saying she'd been happy that I was fully involved in senior year activities, dating a Colonel's son, and didn't want to disturb that rosy picture!

 

Bah, di donc, Mama!

 

When I explained to Jean what had happened, with Mom's apologies, he responded that this lifted a burden he'd carried all those years, not understanding why I wouldn't have wanted to see him. After that we connected on Facebook, and I sent my condolences when his wife Meta died, but there was rarely any other information on his Facebook page, except occasional birthday wishes from his family.

Then, the weekend of December 18-19, I suddenly felt a wave of grief, similar to the one I'd experienced in November when my friend Glenn died. Several days later a friend sent me the link to Jean L. Kreiling's poem "Undertow," and the poet's first name Jean triggered a memory of Johnny, the undertow of our teenage connection pulling at my heart as I searched for what I knew I would find:

Jean Constant Leger, November 14, 1935 - December 6, 2021, service on December 18, 2021. We are sad to announce that Jean Constant Leger of Denver, Colorado passed away on December 6, 2021. He was predeceased by his wife Meta Fay Leger of Fort Smith. He is survived by his four children, two siblings, eight grandchildren, and two great grandchildren.