Thursday, April 1, 2010

Mmmm Good

At our Gainesville Writers Alliance (yes, WAG) meeting last Sunday, Bev Browning talked to us about ghost-writing and her concept of shimmer "how to craft a sentence to manipulate response and amplify meaning."
There's a huge difference between having a great story and being able to write it. The written words have to stand alone without the benefit of your gesture, facial expression, tone of voice, volume, eye contact, and feedback... "Shimmer" refers to the transparent layers that create subtle dimension in written work.
She said round words and mmmm sounds can create shimmer in a sensual experience, then handed out Belgian chocolates and asked us to add layers to this story:
Bev gave us chocolate. We ate it.
This is my shimmer:

She holds a chocolate
in blue and silver wrapper
close beneath my nose
and makes me wait
to open it or place
it in my mouth, but oh
I see it's round,
and notice first
its scent and then,
upon my tongue,
against the far back
of my throat,
how it softly,
slowly melts.

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